Well, its been a few days now. Its been a bit up and down. I've been to work for the last couple of days, if only for a couple of hours. I have worn myself out pretty quickly though. I didn't sleep well again last night so have decided to give work a miss, hopefully getting back to it after the Bank Holiday weekend, be off the steroids by then!
B stayed for the first time since the diagnosis. I have seen him since but we haven't really spent the evening together. He's not saying much, not really sure what he's thinking. I guess he is doing the same as me, digesting things slowly. It has to be a lot for him to take in as well. I am finding it hard to spend what I feel is enough time with everyone I feel I should be. My parents have told me not to worry, to see them when I want to. I just feel that I should be trying to spend time with everyone, except just me. I think I may need some time to myself but I'm not sure. Its quite scary as I don't really want the time to think and inevitably cry.
Having said that today should be relatively quiet, I will probably visit a friend and then go to my parents for dinner. After that a little bit of shopping for my Nan and then home to bed. Hopefully more than 4 hours sleep tonight!
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