Friday, 20 July 2007


Showed the cracks again yesterday. About 5 minutes after B and I headed off to do shopping for tonight I started getting ratty with him. I have no idea why..... I apologised when I realised and was suddenly much nicer....... I don't do mood swings....... Then when we got home I asked why B had done the hoovering when I said I would do it. One of my jobs, he said he didn't know when I would be back and if I would be capable of doing it. This was the statement that got me. Assuming I wouldn't be able to do it when I got in. I know I wasn't well the day before but I had said I felt fine in the morning before I went to work.

This is when the tears started. I hate it when I cry, I have never cried this much before. I cried for a couple of hours when I got dumped once and I have cried at work but never this many times in 2 months. B just held me and said sorry for the comment, which he didn't really need to, I shouldn't have reacted like that to a simple comment. There is another comment that has been swimming round my head recently, we were both a little tipsy when he made it and I think he was joking, so seeing as I was already in tears I decided to bring it up as well. He put my mind at rest about it.

Once I'd had my little cry I said sorry lots and we carried on with the dinner. I do worry how much of this he'll put up with..... How long will I be 'emotionally unstable' for?? The worst thing is it sneaks up on me........

Anyway, feeling a little better today although I think I am possibly one word away from tears again.....

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